Decide today exactly who you are in the Lord. Decide for yourself what role God has for you to play in His Kingdom. God is calling you to a personal, individual path he has laid out for you. This is your primary goal right now in the body of Christ. It is time!

With God's help, once you are able to chart that course, stay on course moving toward what you perceive as God’s call on your life. Learn how to easily and quickly verbalize this course to yourself first, then to others. Arrange all your plans according to this God-given course, gather resources to achieve your short-range and long-range goals. Then, start living out the call. Live it out until God intervenes to redirect you. This will become your personal testimony. You will begin to have a personal witness to God’s activity in your life.

Choose a mate accordingly. Choose a mate that BEST assists the work God has ALREADY BEGUN in you. Choose the mate that best honors that call God has on your life. Speak clearly to them about what you perceive that call to be and how you see yourself achieving it. This will begin to define your spiritual mores, your belief system.

As you begin to state this plan you are desiring to live by, to be known by, what you will and will not do, what you can and cannot tolerate, you will begin to get a clearer picture of who you are in the Lord while clarifying this for those closest to you. Your prospective mate will be able to decide if he/she can honor this.

Anyone who truly loves you will honor who you are in the Lord. They will NEVER ask you to compromise who you believe you are. If your prospective mate cannot accept who you are, and respect you for who you are in the Lord, do not marry them! If you cannot respect your mate for who they are, and honor them for this, do not marry them.

Never marry a person expecting the person to change after marriage! If them changing is that important to you, let them change (and sustain that change for at least a couple of years) BEFORE you agree to marry them! Even then, realize this change may not be permanent. It may simply be a way to get you to marry them. There’s a chance they may revert to old behaviors after you marry.

If the person you are about to marry has problematic behavior before you marry them, decide BEFORE YOU MARRY whether you can live with that behavior should it never change. If they see nothing wrong with this behavior, they are highly unlikely to change it. Regardless, you are free to decide whether you want to live with that sort of behavior. You get to choose. You do not have to marry them.

Realize you can do little to change another person. You must give up all efforts to change a person BEFORE you marry them. You are not really in control anyway. Even though they may tell you that they are willing to stop, they may, when you are away or asleep, do as they did before. So, either trust them completely now or do not marry them. Stop the twenty questions. Stop the spy games. Stop the manipulating and controlling. Give it all up. Live in the moment and trust them entirely or break it off. If you receive solid proof that they are not stopping the behavior, after they agree to do so, you have every right to question their motive, their sincerity and their behavior.

God trusts us entirely. When we fail him, he convicts us and allows us to suffer the consequences, then, he takes us back. That’s how we must treat others we love. If they continue misbehaving, do not truly repent, we have a right to remove ourselves from their presence until sufficient sincere acts of repentance are exhibited over a significant period of time.

Set your expectations for others high, but not too high. Keep expectations realistic or you may end up alone! Compromise where you can compromise. Allow what you are able to allow. Concede every inch you can possibly concede without compromising who you are in the Lord. It's a fine line that begs to be clearly defined. Define it and defend it every time. Just remember that what may be wrong for you is not necessarily wrong for others. Some things are wrong for everyone!

Keep things honest and open. Keep demands reasonable. Marry a person believing they will NEVER change! Then, you can be pleasantly surprised if they do.

Christianity is a lifestyle, not a once-a-week activity. Choose someone for a mate that will support you in being a Christian 24/7.

In review, decide who you are as an individual in the Lord. Then define who you are as a couple in the Lord. (Define this together.) Then, decide how you will live this out together.

If you choose NOT to define these before you marry and do not purpose to live them out together, then CIRCUMSTANCE and PAIN will define your life for you. That's when you will be most unsatisfied. That's when you will feel most out of control. That’s when the tail will be wagging the dog. No one wants to live this way.

Before you marry, show your true character and nature at all times; discuss the plans God has for your life; then, decide if your plan will work BETTER together, or apart. If together, marry. If apart, wait. Otherwise, marriage will be a HUGE risk. It may work out. It may not. It will be a gamble. You must decide.

This is big time stuff! You get this right, and you will get a lot of things right with God, yourself, and others.

Christianity is a lifestyle. Christianity is a walk. Christianity is being a learner and follower of Jesus.

Christianity believes in the literal resurrection and the eventual return of Christ for his family. Christianity is much more than attending a public worship service weekly. Christianity is more than occasionally reading the Bible. Christianity is more about community than communion.

Christianity is listening and following the Spirit as He speaks to you through the Bible, through your child, through a sunset or through your spirit.

Christianity is esteeming others higher than self. Christianity is placing God above all else. Christianity is a daily relationship with the living Christ. Christianity is hearing the Master’s voice in a crowded room, on a mountaintop, or as you comfort a suffering friend pouring out his heart to you at the water cooler.

Christianity is about having the eyes, heart, mind and hands of Jesus.

Jesus is alive. He is real. There is reason to rejoice.

I don't know your circumstances. I don't know your deep pain. Rest assured, he does. Regardless how hopeless the situation may appear, he is risen! There is hope. There is cause for great joy.

I'll let you in on a secret: we will not all come to the sleep of death, but we will all be changed. In a second, in the blinking of an eye, at the sound of the last trumpet: for at that sound the dead will return, free for ever from the power of death, and we will be changed.

This body which comes to destruction will be made free from the power of death, and the man who is under the power of death will put on eternal life.

But when this has taken place, then that which was said in the writings will come true, death is overcome by life.

"O death, where is your sting? O grave, where is your victory?" The sting of death is sin; and the power of sin is the law. But, praise be to God who gives us strength to overcome through our Lord Jesus Christ.

For this reason, be strong in purpose and unmoved, ever giving yourselves to the work of the Lord. Rest assured, your work is not in vain in the Lord.

For he is risen!

“Is God's power real today? I mean, I admit he did some amazing stuff back in the Bible but that was back then, right? I don’t see any pillars of fire, axe heads floating, or seas split down the middle today. Get real! It ain’t happening!”

Ever heard that before? Ever think that before? How about we actually take God out of that not-much-bigger-than-a-cracker-jack-box we put Him in? Maybe then we’ll see what God can do.

Are God’s amazing feats not evident in your life? Could it be because He is faithful? Could He be limiting His power to the box you put Him in? He gives everyone choice, right? So, if you choose to limit Him, would He not honor that? Does that mean He has no ACTUAL power?

What a God! You think He is doing you a favor by staying out of your business, but, really, all YOU are doing is increasing the size of that slice of “humble pie” you’re going to have to eat later, when you most need Him!

Do you need Him? Have you screamed His name in desperation or sadness? Did He come? If he did, upgrade His position in your life. Move him from the box to first class. If He didn’t show up when you cried out, it could be that you really didn’t expect Him.

Try this fresh approach. Walk with God when times are good. Then, maybe you can more quickly recognize His voice and presence in the storm.

Personally, I haven't seen any parted seas lately. But, should you need His power, rest assured He is able. It may not be an actual sea, it could be a personal one. He will walk you through. He will deliver you safely to the other side.

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“God's been slamming this lesson home on me recently. Thought I'd share it. Thanks Dad. Love you.” (From my Army son, 4th Infantry Division, Baghdad, Iraq, 4/11/2006)

"What the world needs now
Is love, sweet love.
It's the only thing
That there's just too little of."

Great words. Great song. It is still true today. We fail miserably in loving others as we should. In our best moments, we love only to be loved in return. With God’s help, we can learn to love with no expectation of return. We can learn to love like God.

Touching, in a non-sexual way, is an appropriate way to show love and endearment. Sensual touching is reserved for marriage. In other relationships, a stroking of the hair or the cheek with the hand is a wonderful expression of love. Appropriate hugging expresses love. It can be given in all situations with a simple arm around neck, and a firm squeeze. Keeping chest away from chest (in a male and female hug) is important. A side-to-side hug, with the arm around the shoulder, keeps it uncomplicated.

Kissing is one of the dearest ways to express love. The Bible encourages Christians to greet one another with a kiss. Kisses can be given appropriately on the forehead or cheek. Mouth-to-mouth is reserved for resuscitation, unless you are married to that person. Although, certain social circles permit kissing on the mouth. Kept brief, this is fine.

Cupping the face in both hands and giving direct eye contact, with words of love and appreciation, is endearing. Eye contact is soul food. Be careful how you serve it. The greatest compliment and affirmation one person gives another is through the exchange of eye contact. Avoid prolonged gazes if you are not married to that person and find yourself attracted to them. (Unless you are single and in search of a mate .) To avoid temptation, make sure the “glint” in the other person's eye is not a reflection of the one in yours! The best advice, in that case, is look away. Running away also is acceptable!

Too many confuse familial love, brotherly love, and other forms of love, with sexual love. We must make certain we send clear and appropriate signals. The wrong signal can forever damage an otherwise healthy relationship.

One cannot experience a deep relationship with another person until one learns how to appropriately express genuine love and endearing affection.

While faith is fulfilled in sight and hope fades with the appearance of the object hope for, love never fails.